Another day in OZ

Well, another day, with no direction.
Some times I feel as tho Im just floating in space with no one around me.
I try posting messages on community boards, only to have them totally ignored.
On one imparticular, there has been over 1800 views, and only 4 responces to what i have had to saw. Talk about feeling like an alien!!!
I dont understand how some people can have a drive, a passion, something to do with their lives.
Or, in the Christian realm, people talk about GOD told them to do this, or, they felt led to go forth.....the only led I have ever felt is lead in my pocket. There have been times I have done things for others which I know was GOD speaking to me, but, felt as tho no one cared that I put my foot forward, I guess I just would like some notice, I would just like to feel significant to someone else.....some justification for being alive..
since my parents died, I feel as tho no one cares if I am alive or dead...
my son didnt even call me to tell me he had bought a house with his girlfriend....I had to find out by callng, asking what he was doing, only to be told, moving into a house they had bought.
The one and only friend online that really can communicate with me, is dying of cancer, what can I do for him?
Life just doesnt make sence to me.....just once, I wish I could see the picture in front of me....