The saddest day

for 7 1/2 years i have been pushing for my partner to get clean and sober, and he just keeps getting more stupid. Doing the most idiodic things when he drinks.
I have finally had enuogh. I told him he could not live in my home anylonger.
I have given him, chance after chance, and im done!

I had told him he had to go to the homeless shelter in Salina, but he found a program in Bellingham, so, he is now, in Bellingham. I am trying to fight off anger...
anger that, i have had to quit the job i love, to take on a full time job i dont know if i will even like.
anger that he gets to take yet another "vacation" away from responsiblitiy and
paying bills, to "get sober"
I am glad that he gets to be with his son, whom he left years ago, and they have forgiven him, it is a new start for him, i cannot let my anger over run the joy of his new beginning. It just does not seem fair...

what have i done to have to carry the bills, and try to keep things afloat.
The plan was to have the ex stay with me, but he has not been here for 2 weeks.
I had hoped it was just the fact that partner was still in the house, but, tomorrow we will see. He said he would come and talk things over.
I just hope i can keep my mind, and not get so stupid when we try to talk.
He always seems to twist things around to make me feel as tho its all my fault.
I just want him to grow up, and become the person i know he can be.
I cannot make him change, but, i dont have to allow him to live here when he is
doing stupid things, just like rob!
im done giving place to live to those who are not trying to grow up and becoming
responsible adults.

I can only hope! & PRAY