You stole my heart, and left me as road kill....never to look back

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It was the day after I signed my divorce papers.
You came into my life in such a mysterious way, the phone call to find a flight to Albuquerque, New Mexico. Not finding a good price, and some chit chat, you asked me to dinner. I never expected to truly go out to dinner with you, I figured you would back out before the actual time came along. When you called me to confirm our date I was amazed. Then when you showed up at my door, I was REALLY amazed!
The knock on the door, my stomach bounced all over the place.
I opened the door, those deep blue eyes had me at hello.
OH MY GOD, the most beautiful man I had ever seen is at MY DOOR! I invited you in, you sat across from me, we chatted about my apartment, about your move to Kansas, you told me about your parents in the nursing home in Roswel New Mexico, about your sisters being there to take care of them, about your brother in Colorado, about you being in the Navy and being divorced and not seeing your son for years and years.
See, I took it all in, every word we said to each other. We talked for two hours before deciding to go eat some dinner. We drove clear across town to go to my favorite restaurant and it was TOOOO busy to stand and wait. So we went to another one not so busy. We looked in the paper for a movie to go see.
I even remember what I ate, and what you ate.
We left to go to the movie, walking into the theater we got the tickets then went "window shopping" you took my hand as we were walking thru the halls of the closed mall....pulling me to look at the sporting goods window, then to the jewelry store, each time making fun of me not liking to shop..
During the movie, you took my hand, ran your fingers over each finger, up my arm, making me feel so sensual. Yes I do remember the movie!! But it was difficult to concentrate on the movie when I had this handsome man sitting next to me tenderly touching my fingers, arm, my neck.....
As we walked out to the truck, you pulled me close, then as we got to the truck, you pulled me closer and kissed me. OH THE fireworks were exploding in my head!
You stole my heart that weekend, and for the next 6 weeks you continued to take a little more of my heart and soul. Our last date together was so special, but looking back now, you didnt say "see ya" when you got back into the truck, looking back, you mentioned not having a credit card to rent a car when you would be going back to Roswel. Was that a hint, you had hoped I would give you mine?
Was that the deciding factor you were going to leave and not come back? The next week we had a date for Saturday, you broke the date telling me you had forgotten about another activitiy you had already planned on going to. I forgave you and you said you would call me on Monday. Tuesday came, and by Wednesday realized you were never going to call me back....
Each day was another day of pain, my heart breaking, life gushing out, as tho, you had left me as road kill along the road of life, never to look back. You left me, and, at a time in my life when I had so many other losses I could not deal with the pain.. I wondered if you were even a real person or a figment of my imagination. Your last day with me, I had taken pictures, they didnt develop. You left a hat, you had NEVER left anything in my apartment, was that a reminder, or just one of your calling cards to the women who love you then leave?
It all seems so hooky reading this now. I hope I NEVER have that kind of pain again, not knowing where you were, what happened to you. Then, strangely enough, a year later when asking online guys if they knew you when I found out they worked where you worked. One telling me you had been involved with a gay woman, trying to get her pregnant because she wanted to have a baby, was this for real?
He even gave me her e-mail address, and, she never admitted sleeping with you, but did say she was a good friend of yours.
Then, she disappeared off line, just as you disappeared out of my life...
After months of agony, wondering what I had done wrong, why you just left me like you did, wondering if I could ever pick up the pieces and walk upright again, if my heart would ever heal.....I finally realized.....YOU had no right to space in my heart, you were not paying rent, you had not made any payments, and, you left with out notice. SOOOO At that point, I had to make amends with my own emotions, and, heal. It took years to get over the rejection, and the fact you just left. Its been almost 8 years now, where ever you are, I hope you have not done the same to other women.
You made me feel so wonderful while you were in my life, made me feel so special, made me want to be a better woman, continue my weight loss, and feeling good about myself for the first time in my life...then...it was gone! My trust in men, my newly found self became different, I knew I wanted to love like I had loved you, I knew i wanted to feel like you made me feel, but, something was different, and its never going to be the same...
You had told me you were a gypsy, a gigalo, now, I know you those were the truths about you.
Not the other things you shared with me. Sometimes I have even wondered if you were the devil in discuise?

JOHN E. DODDS I HOPE YOU NEVER HURT ANOTHER WOMAN AS YOU DID ME!