Life in Kansasgals head

I came home so excited, I had a fun place to work, someplace which would give me support, and, allow me to be me.

Boy was I wrong!
The next day, I immediately got shot down by The guy at work, and, found he was going to be really difficult to work with.

Im trying really hard to get along with him, and, trying not to talk back to him, but, allow him to throw his fits, and then, turn the other cheek so to speak!

He is so unnerving, and so abusive, but, he refuses to see it.
He refuses to talk about it, so, I will allow him his ego, and, try to be the , now quiet (loud bitch) used to be known to be...

I speak about wrongs, and speak against evil, in the people around me, but, that is not the accepted behavior.
Speaking gossip and untruth lies is accepted i guess.

Have I fallen into the pit of gossip?
Please forgive me father, yes I have gossiped about people, when I speak of them with out love and concern.

Please forgive me father for my sins, please show them to me, for I know not what I have done.
I have had heaps of coals upon my head, and, I have
been delivered spitefull vengences against me, stealing away the gold ye have given me.

Please forgive me father for my life has been lead as a harlot,
my marrage vows meant nothing to me, for I was but a child when I married, and knew not what I was diving into.
It has taken me many years to understand mans ego, and, his lack of being able to give of himself to woman.
I still dont understand it, or him, and, you expect us to learn all these things with one man?
The christains do. for when we divorce we break the vows, and, the coals of judgement are poured unto us.

I have tried to live in this community since 1965, and, have never felt so rejected and betrayed as I do right now.
I cant call for help because no one wants to hear of it, they have all been with me thru so much already, and my life just doesnt get any better. So why should anyone want to have to listen to more.....?